Empty Cage

One thing I didn’t really think about with my whole OS switch is the comaptibility with my single most favourite program. Paint Shop Pro 8. I think everyone finds a graphics franchise they like and they stick to it. Which is fine, don’t get me wrong, but now I’m stuck in a bit of a pickle, I can’t design websites right now to save my life. Not that I was the graphics queen before, but this certainly hasn’t helped. I shudder to say the Magical Mystery Tour Fanlisting is finished because it looks terrible, I ripped off the Felicity Worthington layout, and stuck a new (ugly) header up there.

I’m looking at Empty cage now knowing it needs a new look and simple a lot of tender loving care that I wish I had the time and energy for. Of all my courses you’ll be pretty surprised to know that it is Latin that is kicking my ass the hardest. And beyond Empty Cage, I want to update and optimise (to the point of validation) all of my websites, and shrine them… and… and… make more. I’ve also, as I mentioned before promised websites to two other people. I feel bad that I don’t have the bug to do anything website right now. Blargh.

To be honest I don’t feel much like doing anything. I log on the internet, the hours vanish, but I just feel a bit tired of… stuff…

There you go. certified crazy. I want to just be as smart as I know I am capable of but I’m too damn lazy for it. I think I need to get more exercize, let my brain move a bit more. Make myself more alert and stuff, I felt smarter when I was in Europe and on the go.

I have a lot of ‘real life’ sort of updates today (including some web ones, but let’s focus on me haha) and, despite the fact that Syd, my laptop is not yet back from the shop, I can type fairly well on this IBM, even though it sounds positively terrible. It’s on it’s last legs for sure. So, let us begin!

I have finally started school first of all, which is tons of fun in and of itself. I am officially a Philosophy student at the University of Ottawa! A grand school in our nations capital the campus is beautiful, and I’m still a bit haggard from ‘101 week’ which is what they call frosh week. I’m still a non-drinker (I hate the taste, though I have had a few drinks to keep the peace with some rambunctious drunk people), but it is so much motion, and so much meeting, that for someone like me it gets exhausting! I went to maybe half of the events.

Because I’m forcing myself not to be a social recluse here, as I usually am, my goal has been to find venues that I’m comfortable in and meet people, as well as trying to get to know people in my classes in an effort to if not find a ‘best friend’ have people that I could hang out with should I feel so inclined. So far I’ve had some moderate success in this — there’s a pretty nice looking guy in my Latin class who I talk to all the time, and a nice, albeit hyperish girl in my English class who has me in stitches the entire class.

I also try to go to the Thursday night Philosophy Discussion Groups, allowing me to observe people and their theories — this being the only venue that I drink at (if even this!) as we do hold it in the basement of a pub, and I get offered about thirty drinks a night, usually I pull what Andrew would call a ‘Sue Saunderson’ and accept one drink and nurse it all night. Normally I’d be all ‘fierce I don’t drink’ but I’m legal, and I find people get very standoffish and defensive if you just don’t drink, as if because you don’t drink you expect them to not drink. To be honest, I don’t really care too much, but it’s a subconscious thing, and I’d rather not have people be chilly towards me because of my choice. One beer over the course of about four hours once a week doesn’t really concern me too much. As far as I’m concerned it doesn’t even really count, I find I still have about half a glass by the time I leave, which someone else is more than happy to relieve me of.

Other than that, I don’t know if I mentioned on here, but I bought myself an electric guitar this summer! It’s a Seafoam Green Fender Squier, a good solid beginner’s instrument I hear, and I got it really cheap. Andrew provided an amp, and after getting some picks, a patch cord, and a headphone adaptor I find I can kill hours with it. I’m not really following a course or tutorial or taking lessons. In fact, usually I just dig up a tab, and try playing it until it sounds right. Mostly, though, I love to just sit, close my eyes and pluck the strings randomly and see what sort of sounds the thing can make, trying to come up with words for the sounds. If I didn’t have headphones I’m sure my room mate would commit suicide while I did this. Because it isn’t really music, just sound. So far my only accomplishment was finding a way to play power chords comfortably. While Dan showed me how to play them ages ago it was always a painful hyper extention for me, and I was worried my hands were simply too small for the instrument. Did I need a children’s guitar? God I would have lost it, after all, Andrew and Daniel always laugh, because I had to hold a PS2 controller with one hand hooked over the top to hit all the right buttons! Fortunately, after playing with the angle I held the instrument at, I managed to find a comfortable way to play power chords. All-in-all, I’ve really been enjoying learning to play the guitar, I’m absolute rubbish, and can only play things like ‘the intro to Daytripper, Smoke on the Water, and Smells like teen Spirit’ but it’s relaxing for me, and helping me with my goal of not always being on the internet.

My classes are all great except English. English is ‘essay writing’ and we’re currently reviewing nouns and verbs. Yes, seriously! In a University course I am learning that an adjective describes a noun. Other than that I have Philosophy Critical Thinking and Reasoning, History 1500s-1900s, Latin I, and Technical Theatre I. I’ll write more on my courses later, suffice to say, I’m in them, I enjoy them, and only two are big enough to be in lecture halls.

In my little web kingdom, I have (obviously) successfully moved hosts. My next steps involve filling the domain (still!) and changing the entry classification system (use a mix of tags and categories), moving Cursed onto a CMS so I’ll actually be inclined to update. It is my hope to get Cursed completely up-to-date with the finishing of the manga. I want it perfectly comprehensive so I can leave it alone. As well as a new layout. Next I want Loyalties to be a proper shrine, so it will likely also move onto a CMS. I’m looking at Chyrp, if anyone has any input on that. As Amber mentioned Wordpress is pretty heavy duty. Finally, Wonderland, and Enigma are my last two on my immediate to-do list.

Anyways, I do have more to add, like my need to get a job, my trials getting into a computer course, my deepest desire to take driving lessons, and how badly studying for my A+ Technician exam is going, but I need to get ready for Latin. Cheerio.

I haven’t written a ‘heartfelt’ blog since I returned from the UK, so I guess, here’s one. It should be brief because I have things I need to get done today and a whole pile of documentation to write for my mother with regards to her website.

I guess the title of this entry should say it all — or most of it at least. I’m standing on the edge of a number of things right now, and I’m still not sure how comfortable I am with the whole situation. School is obviously the biggest one, as I’m watching the frantic days flutter by I wonder what the hell is going to happen to me come August 30th.

And there’s been nothing but hassles getting into school, it is absolutely mental all the stuff I’ve had to do — you’d think after paying several thousand dollars they’d be able to hire enough people to not make this a nightmare. Currently I’m in two random courses just so I’m “billed properly” which, I have to admit scares me. They’re more concerned about my billing than me actually being in courses I want to be in. Soo… Ancient Greek civilisation and… Chinese… here I come. And for the record, I don’t know a word of Chinese, so, this should be fun. The Greek course, despite my love of history, doesn’t really hold my intrigue at all. So there you have it, good thing I’m being billed properly.

Motherdear also inists I take an essay writing course, which makes me want to throw up in my mouth a little. Despite my major I’m taking two Philosophy courses and three English ones.

Bah.

I have more to say, but work to do.

Well, I guess now is the point in which I finish talking about my trip and talk about my homecoming. Home… such a relative term. Anyways.

 At Munich I also toured Dachau, the other concentration camp on my mission. I took a guided tour and it wasn’t quite as moving as Sachausen, but I learned a whole heap more about sort of what when on in the camp itself. On the whole Munich was a pretty average place to visit. I would recomend it to people who actually drink unlike yours truly.

Keyboards in Germany are bizarre. The letter ‘Y’ and the letter ‘Z’ are actually switched, so it was nearly impossible for me to type anything. In Munich I met an Aussie lady travelling actually with her daughter, I tried to imagine how that would go for me and my mom, and who would try and drown whom first in the beer garden.

There were some other strange things in Germany though, like every cup has a line on it to show exactly where, say o.4 litres is so they don’t accidentally give you too much soda, as well, most bathrooms have an automatic seat cleaner, which, after you flush, wipes down the seat with what looks like a wet napkin. So strange, and yet, so German. My German was terrible as expected.

My thoughts are scattered again, so apologies for another entry that seems disconnected, my mind is missing today. I’m just so… But nevermind.

From Germany I went down to Italy, stopping in a small Austrian town in the Alps. It was pretty, but we only stopped there half an hour. I think it was called St. Johannes or something. Regardless, very picturesque… but of course… I have no pictures of it.

Yea, my second camera was stolen in Venice. Go me. Ugh.

Anyways, Venice was quite interesting, but beautifully terrifying. When they say you ‘get lost in Venice’ this is not some sort of romantic sentiment, this is cold hard fact. You will get lost in Venice. I went into the city thinking I’d spend two or three hours just chilling in the city — seven hours later when I found the train station again. Haha. But yea, camera with all of my pictures from the trip… gone. Figures.

Venice is stange and terrifying with an hundred small streets and alleys the walls are all high so it’s almost impossible to navigate properly, and with all the mask shops and other rather eerie looking places it really is a bit of a creepy city. Though it is interesting to go into a shop and see some Italian painting a mask right there on the front counter. Seriously, genuine Venetian or what? I wish I had someone to talk to in Venice though because I felt very alone the whole time. My Visa stopped working for awhile whilst I was there too, thus leading to a little unbridled terror for one of my days in Venice.

The ‘hostel’ in Venice was actually a camp site, right by the airport. Yes, all night it was awesome all you could hear was ‘VAROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!!’ of the airplanes going overhead. And, my room mates who left on the first day left something rank in the room. Venice was, on the whole a place I was a bit uncomfortable in. I want to go back, but not alone, which is odd for me.

 From Venice I hit Rome which was a bit on the surreal side I have to admit. Oh, look, there’s the Collseum, and… the Forum… and the Pantheon… and a hundred amazing buildings and… well let’s face it, the city oozes awesome from it’s ancient pores. Seriously, if walking London is like walking a novel, walking Rome is like walking a history text book. Who knew the Pantheon was now a Christian church, because I certainly didn’t. Seems, I don’t know, ironic or something.

Vatican City was impressive to say the least, so extravagent, sort of like Versailles, where you sit there thinking no wonder it couldn’t last forever without some serious trouble. I even got to see the real version of my favourite painting, ‘The School of Athens’ by Raphael. And the pope paid for my lunch. Indirectly of course.

I go to the cafeteria and pick up a modest lunch, noting that they take Visa, as to be honest I never had more than 5 Euros cash all through Italy, anyways, I go to pay and wouldn’t you know it, the Visa machine isn’t working. I ask where the nearest ATM is, and she says there isn’t one in the Vatican. I’m starving and probably look it, because she mutters something in Italian and runs off, coming back with a manager looking guy, and they basically say ‘Go eat.’ so there we are free lunch.

Okay.

Sorry this entry is lacking my usual charisma, but my heart isn’t really in it right now. I really want to relate all these stories to you properly, but I’m so dejected about returning to Canada just opening up Wordpress seemed unapealing to the point of nauseating.

Now everyone’s mad because I don’t want to come back, but it’s not the people I don’t want to come back to. It’s that I’ve fallen for this stupid country quirks and all. Everything from the robolady on the Chyuuube, to driving on the wrong side of the road, to the lifts. And I love all you nutty Canucks back home, but this is the place I feel like I should be, and leaving it is hard.

Back to packing.

I have attended my first pagan festival. Yes, officially I have been to a pagan festival. And just typing that makes me feel far cooler and more primal than I actually am. I was like a British explorer stumbling upon native Americans, in a kind of entranced horrified awe at the grotesque beauty of the whole thing. I just abused adjectives like no body’s business there. It had almost everything you could want from a pagan festival, people dancing naked, and fire.

From what I could understand from the swiftly moving events there was some sort of war between the people who were painted red and the other colours. And when I say painted red I don’t mean dabbing on the face, I mean full body scarlet. The director’s eye in me found the organic dancing with the very inorganic drumming (they were using modern drums, not ones with real skins) a little abrasive, but only stage geeks would notice, the energy of the event was fantastic. Though I still find huge the crowds disconcerting. I went with a new friend from work, Carrie, and two of her friends.

You could really get washed away in the vibrant motion of the whole thing, and right at the climax it started to rain. Rather than hinder the event it just got all the more empassioned. This was around the point I fled.

Other than a pagan festival, I have been working for a complete asshole the past three days, and yes, I said it. Carrie and I beat around the bush in conversation saying we were sure he was a nice guy, but I say ‘No.’ and no one will ever take that away from me, this is my blog, bitching ahoy. He was a mircomanaging git, and I will never work for a charity again, because apparently working quickly is more important than doing things right. Ugh!

And a quick update on my websites (the briefness of this whole entry being the fact that it is 2AM and I am officially tired) I plan on getting Sakaki Haruto Fanlisting and Midoriko up as soon as possible. Amber has given me the Ravens Fanlisting which should also be up soon. Nayru finally transferred Mrs. Lovett over to me so if you are a fan of that crazy Pie Maker go join. I’m revamping mom’s website because I hated the old one with a fiery passion aaaaaand I’m writing content all over the place and not uploading it so if all my websites seem incomplete and disoriented they probably are.

To my many commenters who make my life so happy:

Emma Dawn, we will talk more on MSN but HOLY SHIT THAT IS THE BEST NEWS EVER!

Val, I put a few pictures on facebook to tantalize the masses, so enjoy, and now I can stalk your blog. Bwahahahahahaha!

Crystal, Eh?

Maureen, I suppose it would do well to scope them out and see if they are as deranged as we are.

Mom, I am resisting human contact. See the resistance.

Well, I haven’t stopped in here in awhile. Internet access has been a pain, so I’m abusing the work internet for a few minutes. A responsible abuse, I can assure you. Thus, the entry may be short, and very sneaky.

 Oxford, was there maybe last week or so, it wasn’t too bad, I mostly did (dun dun dun) shopping. So, I can’t tell you about the beautiful sites. Also, incidentally, it was pouring. I did get a copy of Memento and eat pizza though, so it wasn’t a total loss.

 So! What else have I been doing? Working! YAY! A charming £9/hour with a 1 braincell/second tax. Angelena’s rant about going to school plays ad nauseum in my head daily. I’m just waiting for my Tell-Tale Heart moment when I shriek to the silent room “I GET IT! SHUT UP!” The office is as silent as a tomb usually, as I liken tapping on keyboards to rattling bones or something equally spooky.

I am allowed to listen to music, but my ears actually hurt from two weeks straight of having ear buds in them. So I’ve gone unplugged today (buy the album) and kind of want to gouge my eyes out. No particular reason, but it might illeviate the boredom.

Some nice things about my job — well, not the job specifically, but they are more work related than not. The nearest Tube (Chyuuuube) Station is St.James’ Park. I work on the short street between the Chyuuube Station and the actual park.

I talk to mom quite a bit because I get so bored at lunch, see example below.

April 1st:

“God, mom, the weather here is bloody TERRIBLE! I have never seen anything so miserable.”

“Tell me about it, at least there’s something in common!”

“APRIL FOOL’S! I’m sitting on the grass in the warm sun in the park surrounded by flowers!!”

Wasn’t that a funny April Fool’s Prank? I thought it was hysterical.

My new pals the Kiwis don’t get it. But then, they’re so far south they frequently get cut off the bottoms of maps.

Ah! I haven’t mentioned my new found knowlage of New Zealand, and love for all things Kiwi! New Zealand is the Canada of the Southern Hemisphere you see. Always getting bullied by stupid Australia!

I learned much about the Kiwis after meeting Clare the Kiwi in the Earl’s Court Hostel, then finding out my fellow bored temping co-worker James is ALSO a Kiwi! We hardly talk for fear of hurting the silence, but when every one else was in a meeting I found the ideal ice breaker.

“Am I the only one who wants to KILL myself?”

“Yea, I’m on Facebook.”

“Fair enough.”

So, he was on Facebook and we had quite the talk about how little work he does. Thus, my rebel-blogging!

I went pub hopping with my Kiwi Pal Clare, and a (quite good looking) Scottish guy named Jamey. Andrew and I are finito (again) and so I am allowed to look at cute guys. I have his phone number so I win. Told me to look him up if I was in Scotland. He’s 22 so there’s no prayer, I’ll just gaze dreamily off into space.

Thank you to my beloved commenters, I’ll reply to them on the next entry. I’m off to Dublin tonight!

I woke up this morning and there was a small finch-like bird fluttering around the house. Now I hate netspeak and all the but surprisingly I could practically feel the thought bubble burst above my head.

“WTF?”

It took me a clean hour to convince the little thing the door was open… I imagine it had probably fluttered into the glass desperately a number of times already. I just want to know when it got in… it was either when Mike left for work this morning or had been in overnight!

I’m booking my ticket to France for tomorrow because the agency just called because they forgot to mention I have orientation for this new job on Thursday. Gee, what a bloody thing to forget. Anyways, I’m still going to France and trying to come up with somewhere else to go over easter. Maybe Edinburgh. As much as I wanted to throw the phone at a wall I think I was very mature about having to completely shift my trip due to a bit of a stupid mistake on their part. And maybe I’ll get to see another new place (or old place that I love) thanks to this largely unplanned break in the trip. Maybe even somewhere closer like Oxford or something. I’ll be paid for the orientation, so I can’t complain too much.

Uhm, in other news, I talked on the phone to Terri last night, and it was pretty much awesome. I’ll probably call Ange or Stacey tonight, because I’m not racking up roaming charges on my phone by calling people from France. Sorry guys, you aren’t worth that much to me after all! Bahahahahahahahah~~! I kid, I kid, but roaming charges means I cannot afford to bring anyone British Sweets, so choose your battles wisely.

Other then that– anyone who has any suggestions as to where to go for Easter send me a Comment… and don’t say Isle of Wight, I hear the place is booked solid, the whole island, during Easter.

Well, the employment agency sent me back a lovely e-mail saying they should have a job for me on the 25th. Fusked! So I have decided to go to Paris for a week. The job will be Dullsville data entry, but on the bright side I can listen to tunage while I do it. I have a feeling it will be a lot like inputting invoices at the bookstore. Regardless, it gave me an empty week which I have decided to fill with the French.

 The fare will be about £44.00 via train to Paris. So, I need to go buy myself some Euros.

Nothing else done today as usual. All the best to my beloved commenters!

Ange, there’s a reason why Sugilove was first D=

Amber, I got Cyndaquil fanlist at TFL, it’s taken at TAFL, but I was never a fan of the anime so there =3

As the title suggests this is pure unsaturated website jargon. Tomorrow I’ll write you all about my British exploits.

I spent today writing content for various websites, specifically finally getting bloody Cursed online and in it’s happy place. Literally, most of my day was spent on that little gem, polishing it to within an inch of it’s life. I’ll have to get more caught up in the series to continue the spit-shine job I intend to do on it, but at least now it doesn’t look like I wrote it in 2005. Har har.

I’ve started work on Ruins too, the planned website for Angel Sanctuary’s Mudo Setsuna and Alexiel. Not enough to stick up, but enough that it might actually get finished one day. One day… and you can insert an epic echo effect here. There’s been a chance this shrine will switch to Kira/Lucifer before I’ve finished but I will neither confirm nor deny that assumption. If anyone reads this and has an actual preference let me know XD Maybe even Uriel.

Following that, Bloodlust might get reduced to a single character shrine, probably Sugimura, maybe Chigusa, Mimura or Kawada. Reason being, a site that huge is so daunting to do alone. Alternatively, I’ll make a shine to tide me over until I feel like making a full out website for everything. I feel like it is required that I have at least something Battle Royale related on my domain.

Loyalties and Valour are both getting ready to be fully shrineified. After my vow of not creating fanlistings without full accompanying shrine, Nevermore’s shrine is of course completely backburnered until I decide on an angle for it. I applied for three fanlistings today, and one a few days ago, hopefully I’ll get approval on at least one of them.

Other fandom websites I want to make are for things like the Cheshire Cat, Godchild, Pinkfloyd/Bauhaus/theDoors, Fromhell/Sweeney, something nostalgic like Pokemon, Digimon, and/or Sailor Moon and something Shakespearian. Though before I get too far ahead of myself I do want to get everything I’ve started relatively well established.

What all this means to the people who follow my website designing (aka. No one…) Things are going to start getting done and filled and ready to go. I do live in fear of having a useless domain so hold onto your hats folks Things are about to get ugly.

Three big days in a row and I have yet to report on either of them. I am currently at YHA in York. I am ticked at the YHA of course, I get here tired and lost and the front desk guy asks if I want an YHA membership, as usual, I say no and of course he slides in ‘yourroomisanextrathreequidanight’ aha! The catch, doing the math if I pay the three pound a night I’m still only one pound off, but, if I decide to extend my visit then it’ll be worth it, and I can stay at a YHA hostel when I get back into London. It’s just hysterical that last little grab at money. I got a twenty-four hour internet voucher for today and tomorrow, so that I’ll be set until I go back to London. I have to go to London whether a get a job here or not unfortunately because my luggage is still in London.

But let me start at the beginning here, the day before yesterday I died and went to heaven. I went to the Mecca of History nerds; I was at the British Museum, oh my god. It was like heaven, I almost burst into tears of joy when I saw the real Rosetta stone, it was beyond the most amazing thing I had ever seen, one slab of rock that his taught us immeasurable things about the past—it makes me giddy just thinking about it. I had barely scraped the surface of the Egypt exhibit before closing time because I must have gotten lost about a hundred times before I got there. I cannot even come close to describing the sheer joy of being in that museum. Man, I am such a bloody nerd. I plan on going back and actually taking some pictures because the first time around I decided I wanted to look first. I’ve been trying to live my trip and not spend as much time snapping all the sights as I did last time. I only pull my camera out if I am really inspired. I’m sure I’ll need it when I walk York Minster tomorrow. While I do plan on dropping off CVs here I’m treating York like a bit more of a Holiday. I like my prospects of getting a job in London much more than York. I do love this town though; it’s beautiful, like living in a medieval village. I spent five hours on a bus today getting here, I should hope I like it.

The scenery around York is much prettier too; it’s a very tranquil town. Walking to my hostel was a bit of a drag though, it’s about a mile from the train station and I didn’t know what bus to take and so I walked it instead, overshot it by a lot and then was helped by an old lady who seemed to have a half German half Yorkshire accent. I have reason to believe she was both the loneliest lady in the world and a touch senile. She insisted on talking to me until her bus came, and then got the bus driver to take me there. I felt very awkward, but she was very interested in Canada and kept asking if I was sure I wanted to stay at the hostel. I was a touch sketched out, so I declined several times. I’m sure she was perfectly lovely, but all I had wanted to know was if I was going the right way! I’ll be hitting the streets tomorrow, but I think I know my way back here. This hostel is much nicer than the other one there seem to be more families and older people here than at ISH.

It’s hard to avoid being a bit disheartened, despite the fact that I’ve really only been job hunting five or six days, and only looking for actual retail jobs since yesterday. I had been relying on job boards and job websites, when really it’s probably more about just applying at places like HMV, Virgin records, Borders and W.H. Smiths, the big music and book chains. I don’t know, I just miss my family and friends now I think. That or I’m getting really nervous about not having a job.

And to my commentors

Mom, I’ll talk to you on the phone, the cover of the book in the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the galaxy is ‘Don’t Panic’ and I’m going to give that a try.

Amber, I love you and will AIM you.